EPISODE 5 – Mithun and Sanjay.

This is not a normal episode but an abnormal one as it features the two great actors of our time. The fact that the episode is small does not mean anything.

It starts with our charismatic characters getting drunk in a pub. They walk back home in their sine wave shaped paths. They almost got run over by a drunken lorry driver. Though safe they were in great fear. It was not the fear of dying that sneaked upon them but the fear of getting robbed. They were just men and moreover drunk men. Their fears were multifold in their inebriated state. They spoke about it to each other and came to a conclusion. The conclusion was something like “I will grab his hand and you kick him in the nuts! Later on we will pound the shit out of him.” Consoled by the great remarks they walked straight down the dark alley. When they got close to home they were greeted by the distant howling of dogs.

They had just reached home. They were welcomed by a benevolent dog that had come too close. Mr.Ass with his fear for dogs jumped up to the hands of his friend. Raka caught him and told him that it was the aroma of chicken which is exuding from his hands. The dog came close to him and wagged its tail. Mr. Ass had a different experience today. All his experiences were similar when it came to dogs. All of them ended with a racing competition where Mr.Ass always won.

The dog looked a bit cute so Raka went ahead and just tapped it on the head. Never has the world seen such wonder as Raka had seen that day. Mr.Ass tapped the dog too!! When asked why he did it, all he said was that the dog looked friendly. None of the mortals will ever know about the miracle that happened till now. This is the proof that the miracles do happen and can be experienced by mortals.

They reach home with high spirits but alas all the spirits at home were roaming in their dreams. The pair had to stand outside for a few frustrating moments till one of the spirits wandered out of the dream and to the reality of the constantly ringing door bell. The spirit says something like “I though the doorbell was ringing in my dreams.” The reply for that was a little “Fu** you!” The twin spirits now seat themselves in a comfortable corner and light a cigarette. Raka said “What do we do now! Everybody is sleeping!” Mr.Ass Replies “Screw them! Let’s watch TV”.

There they were swinging to the loud and heavy music from the Television. It was a real “Screw them” for others at home. Most of the dreaming spirits wandering in the seas of babes were aroused to the reality of the hard stone floor. The spirits once awaken from their deep sleep always have a bad effect on the person who awake them. Hence the angry curses of the once sleeping spirits changed the course of the twin spirits. They had to switch channels to less audible escapades. The Channel surfing stopped at a Hindi movie. The movie is immaterial only the characters.

There was all entertaining Govinda and the all macho Sanjay Dutt in the movie. The twin spirits were really engrossed in the movie. The movie got lots exciting when the heroes were battering the shit out of the villains. The heroes attack the pack from the top. Sanjay with a AK47 shooting at everybody around and Govinda clobbering the shit out of the sidekicks. Why there was a large scale war was never in the minds of the twin spirits. The only thing that went through their inebriated minds was the fact that they were drunk and they were having fun.

There was a turning point in the movie. Sanjay goes in to the great villain, a cruel one who does not spare children. He fires at the villain, the villain fires back. The bullets spray are allover the place but the two of them. The villain runs out of ammo. He gets behind a truck and picks up his handy sword. They look into each others eyes and the Sanjay just goes ahead and drops his fully loaded gun. I have no idea as to why he did it and neither did the twin spirits. They were actually puzzled by the proceeding. All the anguish and the pain would be over in one bullet. Why did he have to drop the gun?

With puzzled look on their faces they looked on at the movie. The villain comes forward and drops his sword and they start clobbering each other. The twin spirits say nothing else of the movie for they were madly laughing their guts out. They muster the breath to speak and Raka says “They are doing it the old fashioned way! Fuc**** barbarians!” Mr.Ass gasps out “They come, look at each other and drop their weapons and clobber each other.” Raka says “I have never seen such a movie man! Awesome man!” Mr.Ass says “Haven’t you seen Mithun Da’s movies?” “One guy with a sword runs towards two hundred guys and chops them all. What do you think others are holding?” Raka doubtfully tries answering “Guns?” Mr.Ass says “Not just guns! Big machine guns! Bullets just fly close to him. That is the greatest distance they get to him”. Raka starts with a little smirk which grows to be a booming laughter which is reciprocated. All the laughing revived the sleeping spirits to their consciousness.

That was the last time the twin souls laughed all their hearts out. For after that they were bitten, beaten and clobbered to sleep. There ended our short episode (just fooling around).

- Bye